Writing this while listening to Vancouver Sleep Clinic - Someone To Stay. Thank you, The Good Doctor.
Anyway, I miss my old life. Chilling out, listening to music, or reading some good book, or being too occupied drawing something. Man, life was good back then. And now? Ha. If I'm not thinking of different ways to kill myself, I would plaster on a fake smile on my face while despising everyone around me. There are days where I find it hard to breathe, and it feels like a heavy stone was set on my chest. But I'm a one tough motherfucker. So yeah, I haven't succumb to all the suicidal ideation or depression thoughts. I guess talking about it a lot - either in real life or online (and of course, mostly I talk about it on Twitter lol) - helps me in a way. Y'know it's not good to pent it all up. 'Cuz you bound to explode sooner or later.
I actually haven't take a shower since last night lol. Once, I haven't eaten a proper meal for almost 24 hours.
Sigh. I suck.
Bye.
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still do. sometimes.
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