How To Deal

I am currently furthering my studies where the prospect career for me requires me to deal with people. Interacting and communicating with them. There are different kinds of people and for sure you won't like all of them. I mean, heck, I don't even like myself some days, let alone other people.

I am sure most of you have once read/listen to a quote "to change other people you must first change yourself" or its varieties. This applies especially (but not limited) to those who complain everyone hates them or nobody likes them or they always find themselves having fights with their friends and...well, you get my drift. Instead of pointing your finger to others, blaming them for your 'friendless' situation, why don't you take a good look in the mirror and think for a while. Try to consider the minute possibility that what is wrong in the first place is you. If your 'friends' who hate you still can get along with each other just fine, then maybe, just maybe, it's something to do with you. I know it's hard to criticize yourself, since we tend to believe we are so righteous in the first place. Unless you don't mind ending up dying all alone.

If you have done some serious contemplation or if you have tried changing your attitude and it still doesn't work, here's a golden secret (though many are not able to practice it): Tolerance and patience. I tolerate with people because I know nobody is perfect. Maybe he's used to poke fun at people or he never really think twice to whatever he's saying (and he doesn't mean bad). Maybe that's just the way he is. Hence, take whatever he's saying with a pinch of salt. However, keep in mind that being tolerant and patient does not mean giving other people green light to do whatever they want to you and you accept them with open heart.

Let me tell you something: sometimes, I meet people who I instantly hate dislike from the first sight (and I am not proud of it). But I don't blame them. It is because I realize it is silly to dislike someone when they had done nothing to you - even sillier to dislike them from the first sight (but hey, there's love at first sight, so why not hate at the first sight too?).  Or sometimes, someone did something I hate and *poof!* he's out from my good book. However, I just bottle those feelings inside, try to smile and keep good relationship with them. Now, some people might say I'm a hypocrite. Well, maybe I am. But, to quote from the Quran, "Whatever good, (O man!) happens to thee, is from Allah; but whatever evil happens to thee, is from thyself" (4:79). Maybe this doesn't really describe best, but I hope you get what I'm trying to say. Instead of succumbing to the negativity, why not spread the love? (or at least not spreading the hate?)

I know it's not easy dealing with various people. But that's how life is. God created us different from each other, from our appearances to our attitudes. Just remember to discard the negativity and embrace the positivity :)

Cheers.